Its been a minute…been so busy that i forgot to post the last part to Walls. I had a fabulous weekend. My head is still reeling from the amazing people i met. I even met a blogger who i found as controversial as his blog. It was an amazing time amongst friends.
Walls will always spring up if we let them. Our lives are fertile ground for walls. The foundations are in the little things we do or failed to do. The Bible says “A little yeast works through the whole batch of dough.”
This story is as much for me as for anyone who can identify and learn from it. Here is looking at the future and breaking down them walls…
While we are blaming everything else but ourselves for the walls that have sprung up between us, let’s not forget to blame the ‘people’. The ‘people’ deserve a fair share of the guilt as well. Maybe even more than inanimate walls and phones. The ‘People’ are the ones that make walls and phones come alive.
It was people that told us Surulere was no longer a fitting abode for an up and coming businessman and his wife. It was people who assured us building more physical walls meant progress. They failed to tell us about walls that existed within walls.
People call phones.
They call in the morning to remind us of what we are missing by staying a little longer in bed, holding each other.
They call in the afternoon and cut short our lunch date.
They call at night while we are in bed navigating the now unfamiliar waters of our love.
They call during vacations, sessions with the marriage counselor, fertility treatments…
So while we are at it, blaming everything but ourselves for these walls that now divide us, let’s not forget to blame the people.
Her mother who shows up at our doorstep ever so often reminding us of how her back yearns for grandchildren to carry.
My friends who persuade me night after night that hanging out with the boys is far better than having dinner at home.
Her friends who bring her evidence of my affairs and implore her to do something about it.
The psychologist who gets paid for failing at putting our marriage back together.
Yes, let’s blame people. And while we are at it, let’s not forget the people with whom the blame lies with the most.
For answering those damned phone calls. For letting the world into the four walls of our lives and bowing to their demands for more walls.
Walls, phones, people, she and I…blame runs deep.
I hear her drive into the compound. The thud of her feet on the ground as she runs into the house rhymes with my heartbeat. I stand in between two walls. Walls that I built to shelter her and our life together. I place my hands against them. I feel like Samson. I would pull down every wall for her. I would destroy every phone if it would make things alright. I would fight all the people in the world to keep her safe.
She is wearing sneakers as I had imagined. Errant strands of her hair have pulled loose from the knot she pulled it back in.
She comes close enough for me to tell she has been chewing mint gum.
Her hands are trembling. I steady and kiss them.
I do not tell her it will be alright.
I go on my knees.
I do not ask her to give us a second try.
I hold my breath. Saying the wrong thing might build another foundation for walls to fester upon. She kneels with me.
“Just say ok” I whisper in her hair.
“Ok” she says and I can breathe again.
Light streams in through the windows. Even sound proof imported brick walls cannot keep it out.
The sun is risen.
©2011 | Kiahscripts
Song of the day: India Arie – The Heart of the Matter