She and Segun are as tight as thieves already. She never fails to remind me that she is directly responsible for my good fortune in finding this “jewel of man”. 

Segun says to always take the half full glass approach so here goes – The woman cooks so I get to eat great food without giving away a substantial part of my monthly income to Brooklyn’s chefs. She cleans so I get to come home to a comfortingly neat apartment as against all the clutter that constitutes my life. Most of all, her endless chatter wearies me and leaves me with no strength to dream sad dreams.

You can’t help but love Segun and his relentless optimism. Any man who still wants to hang out with my mother after 4 days of her non stop chatter deserves to be raptured with the saints. A mansion in heaven would also be fitting. 

I haven’t told him about having sex with Marcus. I tell myself that what matters is that I never do it again. It is one of the few reasons I am glad Mom is around. She helps keep ghouls (Marcus) at bay.

We all had dinner together last night and between my mother and Segun, I felt human for the first time in a long time. After Segun dropped us off, Mom and I had some wine and talked. She said Segun is in love with me. I asked how she knew.

‘I just know. No man looks at a woman that way without being in love.’ My mother answered

‘Oh come on Mom! You are just seeing stuff because you want to.’ I told her as I refilled my wine glass.

‘And you aren’t seeing anything because you don’t want to.’

She was right so I just drank some more wine.

‘I saw your father in Abuja the other day. He asked after you. He says the family is organizing a 10 year memorial for Maami and they would love to have you there. Something about you being her favorite grandchild.’

I said nothing. There was no need to and soon enough the silence drove my mother to bed. 

I want to tell her that I know all about Maami’s memorial. I want to tell her about the emails that I never reply. I want to tell her about the gifts that come in the mail every Christmas and are signed “Love Dad”. I want to tell her how the folks at Goodwill look at me crazy whenever I hand over the brand new wristwatches, gadgets, perfumes every other Christmas. I want to ask her how forgiveness can come to her so easily.

I have an appointment with Elsa tomorrow so she can repair the butchery she performed on my hair last week. I will ask her what kind of flowers say thank you best. 

I will ask her what kind of flowers say ‘I love you, Mom’ best.

Song of the day: Ed Sheeran- Fall