Well, y’all can probably tell this from the title of the post, this is not a story.
I am on a break from storytelling… My muse is asleep or she is off to warmer places and has left me behind in this cold. 🙁
Last year was not my most thankful year. I am one of those very few people who does not like that phrase “count your blessings”. I have always worried about what it would mean if I ran out of blessings to count. Would that mean I am not as blessed?
Late last year, I reached a new low on the gratitude scale. It always amazes me how God uses lows to take you to new highs, valleys to bring you to heights you never dreamed about.
In my new low, surprise surprise but I learned thankfulness. In all that darkness of last year, I found the way to God’s heart- gratitude!
I don’t have any stories for you guys today but I thought I could share the story of my path to a grateful heart. It starts from the little things- from being thankful it wasn’t as cold today as it was yesterday to appreciating the blonde man with braided hair like Vikings on the subway. Lol! Of course I had to bring Ragnar Lothrok into this. Anyway, lets carry on shall we…
The following are reasons I don’t even need to take stock of to be thankful. They stare me right in the face daily, wake me up in the morning, accompany me to work, drive me to do and be better than I am everyday..:
- The Word: God’s word is indeed a sword. It has fought and won every battle of depression, of sadness, of fear and many more that I have entrusted to it. I am blown away almost everyday at The Word.
- Love: Paul was so inspired when he wrote that first letter to the Corinthians. Love is what has kept me, that keeps me still. God’s everlasting love and the love of the people around me.
- Dreams: I have lived on two continents so far and three countries. God continues to amaze me wherever I go. Just the other day, someone referred to me as a global citizen. I think of how far God has brought me; that child born in Ibadan not too long ago and now all of these. It hasn’t been easy having to up and leave family and loved ones but this is my dream and I am so thankful I get it as my reality as well.
- People: God has always always surrounded me with the best people. From my family to friends to coworkers to even strangers I meet once and never again, I am just so blessed to learn from these images of God. I like to believe the best of people- this doesn’t always end up well but it hasn’t stopped me yet and I have found it more fulfilling than the other scenario.
- Me: There are many times I have asked God why he didn’t make me like the girl next door- normal, ordinary, okay, well not that ordinary. He hasn’t answered me yet. From my career to my writing to my relationships; I stand out like a ‘happy’ thumb. Sometimes all you want is to fit in, to be like a regular girl. I have never felt that way! Recently though I stopped questioning the way I am and being thankful instead.I spoke to this lady that has known me a while last week, since I was a teen actually and she said “Nobody loves like you, Kiah. I am much older than you and in my almost 50 years I have never seen anyone love people like you” I cried when she said that because I don’t seem to always get this loving people thing right. I am the friend pushing my friends to take next steps in their careers, the one with the “tough love”, the one who annoys people around her because she sometimes smothers with love, the one who does too much…I am learning that it is okay to be this way. I am learning God does not make mistakes and He didn’t suddenly decide I would be His first. So here I am thankful that The Potter in his infinite wisdom molded me this way; crazy, talented, pushy, stubborn, beautiful and all about love. I wouldn’t want to be anyone else.
So these are the top five things I am grateful for. They aren’t the typical things you would expect but these are MY blessings, the ones I don’t even to count before I realize how blessed I am. They are the reasons for which I dance, for which I lift up a song in the dead of the night, for which I can look forward to tomorrow…
There are a million other blessings that I cannot count and I find now that I know the real meaning of the phrase “count your blessings…” It was never about counting blessings till you couldn’t move your lips no loner. It is about getting to this place in my counting where I am in so much awe about what God has done that I cannot go on…I find that that is alright. The process is what matters.
So today, count YOUR blessings people.
Song of the day: R.Kelly – The Storm is Over